I have little sympathy for Matt Dubay or his 3-month (ex)girlfriend. I think they, and the kid, are lucky the days of the 'shotgun wedding' are pretty much gone.
I know women who use their wombs as weapons. Dubay's ex lied to him and told him that she was infertile and on birth control. That should have been warning enough that something wasn't quite right. Regardless, he must have been thinking with his pecker. The guy should have used a condom. Better yet, maybe should have kept it in his pants until he had a better sense of what the girl was like.
There is no sure-fire 100% guarantee when it comes to preventing pregnancy. My first was the result of a condom mishap, my second was a spermicidal foam baby. I love my kids, and believe that they exist because they were meant to be. I gave the DNA donor of the first child the option to participate from the beginning, or to stay away permanently. It was a relief to me that he chose the latter, even considering that I ended up on welfare for two years while I worked and went to school.
We are friends with a couple who delivered a big surprise - full term - during an ER visit for recurring stomach pains. They're in their 40's, with two teenagers ready to leave home. Too busy, under stress... neither of them had any idea she was pregnant, as she was using birth control. Another baby that was 'meant to be', lucky that he'll be loved and cherished regardless of the circumstances of his birth.
I really feel sorry for Matt Dubay's kid. The least the guy could do is suck it up and try and be a good dad. At least the kid will have something to talk about in his high school government class.
I have a enormous amount of respect for men who get duped, and still opt to participate, financially and emotionally, in the life of an unexpected child.
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